Daycare

Oh man, I had heard how hard it is to drop off your child at daycare, but it was still harder than I expected. On the way back home, I had to fight back tears, and I found my hands were gripping the steering wheel for dear life keeping that car from making a U-turn. However, the daycare near us seems really good. The nursery room teacher is wonderful, sweet and practical. The room is clean, cheerful, orderly and safe. There are toys, books, safe cribs and all the proper equipment. The state regulators found nothing but a couple of minor, quickly-corrected violations. I have no reason to worry.

As for a long-term solution, we're meeting with a local grandma who I found on care.com. If that meeting goes well, and we get the details coordinated in a way that works for us both, than we'll start him there.

As for the budget, I think it's going to work. We had to sacrifice in other areas, and it's still going to affect our savings, but not as much as I thought it would. So it looks like once-a-week daycare really is going to work out. I'm still not totally OK with it as a mom, in that I'm not the mom I thought I was going to be. This experience has been so humbling. At least I can be more compassionate and understanding, though. All moms are unique and God gives each of us different strengths and weaknesses. The sooner I accept myself for who I am, the better I can serve my child. One day a week in daycare or at a non-family babysitter is not going to hurt him. Quite the opposite, if it gives him a change of pace, kids to play with, and a chance to learn how to obey and connect with other care givers and teachers. He'll learn new things, play different games, etc.

Still, though, part of me wants to zoom over there and scoop him back up!

OK, now it's time to get off the computer and make the most of this day. Pray for me!