Jim and I have started to let Andrew cry it out. I hate it, but it seems to be the only solution.
*He's started crying immediately after we lay him down. Before, he would lay there for awhile and then cry or fall asleep.
*Sometimes he cries even if one of us is rocking him!
*The only way to get him to stop crying is to rock him to sleep and keep rocking him for at least 30 minutes. I did that for 2 nights in a row because he was teething, but I didn't want it to become a habit. We worked too hard for too long to teach him how to fall asleep on his own.
*He's shown signs of understanding object permanence, so he can know that we don't just disappear even if we're not in the nursery. Plus, if we're in there, he just stands in his crib and cries harder, so it's best if we're not within eyesight.
*All of the good baby books I've read recommend letting them CIO at 8 months due to separation anxiety kicking in.
*The longest he has howled is 45 minutes, and it was painful, but he did fall asleep on his own and stayed asleep. One of us would go in every 5-10 minutes and lay him down in his crib and make sure he hadn't thrown all of his pacifiers out of the crib.
*We're still doing his night routine, and we're giving him the normal remedies for teething.
Does anyone else have any suggestions? I feel like a monster comes every night to kidnap our sweet baby and terrorize us.
My Kiddo… a second try
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4 comments:
We do cio as well once they're about 9 months if needed, and the key we've found is what you're already doing. We do the bedtime routine happily (if you're feeling anxious about bedtime they pick up on it) and put them to bed and give them paci, lay them down, and say, "go night night!" kiss them and leave. When we're training they start to scream and we stay out for 5 min...I watch the clock every second.
At the 5 min mark I go in and say, "It's ok, Mommy's here, I love you!" I give a kiss, give paci back, lay them back down, cover up, and say again, "go night night!" then leave.
5 min later I go it lay down, cover up, give paci and say, "I love you, go night night" and leave much quicker
5 min later I go in and do not say anything. I hug quickly and lay down give paci and cover up.
from then on, visit 3 on, every 5-7 min I go in, do not make eye contact, but lay them down, cover up, give paci and give a gentle pat. Usually it takes about 3 or 4 nights before they get the message and go to bed well.
The bottom line is being aware of your child and whether or not teething, illness, or other emotional/physical developments are taking place so as to not allow crying when it's not necessary, which you already addressed. I hope this comforts you, what your doing does work and usually pretty fast!
It already seems to be working! Yesterday he howled hysterically for over an hour before taking a very short nap. Then he sobbed for about 30 minutes before taking a 2 hour nap. Last night, he cried for like 5 minutes and slept all night. Yay!
That's awesome! congrats! Just dont be too upset if he regresses constantly for the next year :) it's amazing the number of upsets that can occur in a little baby's world.
Oh I remember those days! The only advice I have is to not let yourself feel guilty. Babies will sense your sad feelings about what you are doing and they will play on your emotions! Plus, if he senses that you are not feeling right about something, he will take your cue and think, "If Mommy is upset then something must be seriously wrong!"
Just try to think of how you would feel if your 3 year old was crying, not going to sleep, and had preschool in the morning. You as a Mom know that a good nights sleep is what is essential for him to have a good day at school. Or how would you feel if your child cried because they didn't want to wear their helmet when riding their bike. It would be a non-issue because you know what is best for your child. I feel like bedtime is the foundation of future discipline. Discipline defined as in 'teaching' as opposed to 'punishing'.
Plus you know him well and know that there are appropriate times to bend. Like rocking him while he's teething. Long story short...be confident in your choices so he will feel secure. You are such a good Mama!
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